Monday 11 June 2018

Hard Times

Completely unrelated to a novel by Mr Charles Dickens or a song by a pop-punk band, this is a blog post somewhat to do with why I've been away from my beloved blog and how I've been coping with life. 

There's potentially a fine line between what is OK to share on my piece of the internet and what should be kept private. There may well be an update very soon on what's going on with me, but my family and I have had some health issues lately, and it's felt pretty overwhelming at times. My dad is now out of hospital and recovering at home which is great, and that's one thing I'm finding much easier to cope with now. But these tricky times have made me think about what I'd like to do aside from work to keep myself busy, and how to make myself feel a little less like I'm drowning in everything that's going on. 
(bare with me, it's nothing groundbreaking but there's some interesting things thrown in here!)

Most obvious coping strategy first: my blog. It's a year old now, and I started it last year when I was having a tough time of things. I've been away 'cos I've not known what to write about when I've had lots going on in my life. I didn't think I'd write about it because now (a very small amount of) people actually read my blog, I didn't want to bog anyone down with personal life stuff that is of no relevance or interest to them. It's always hard to get back into something when you've left it alone for what feels like too long, but I knew I had to come back to it. I didn't fancy buying anything to review, and nothing exciting has happened for me to write about either. However, I started this just as my own little venting space, so why the hell shouldn't I use it for whatever is going on, good or bad? And so; here I am. 

A couple of other things I've been doing to help myself to feel more in control are a little odd, but I guess do make sense when I think about it. I've spent a lot of time cleaning and tidying - the flat has never looked so good! There's something really satisfying about scrubbing your living space within an inch of its life, and I am definitely someone who feels better when their environment is clean/tidy/good/(insert all nice and lovely words here). I've also found a lot of interest in eating a little bit better and paying more attention (occasionally) to what I put in my body. Don't get me wrong, I definitely still have issues with food and body image, but I definitely feel more in control when I pay what I'm eating more attention.

I think that's what both of these points above come down to - control. When I'm feeling so overwhelmed with everything going on around me and I can't do anything to change it, I'm definitely finding comfort in being able to control the things I CAN change. My environment and my food being just some of those.

I don't consider myself to be a religious person, but I have had a few people lately say "god never sends us more than we can deal with". Now, despite not being religious, this has (somehow) brought me a lot of comfort. It's a reminder that people are going through some really rubbish times, and we do always come out the other side, one way or another!

Really simply, I've just been trying to do more things that make me happy. Making time for a bath of an evening, spending that little bit extra time making something yummy for dinner and watching The Greatest Showman 2305827 times all help to make the days feel a little bit better. Maybe I've been a little more introverted than normal, but I'm okay with that. I'm still regularly seeing people who make me happy, whilst also making time for myself. 

If you're having difficulties coping with things in your life right now, focus on what makes you happy and feel like you have choices. Do you want to stay indoors with your 4th day unwashed hair and watch your favourite film with a pizza or do you want to go out with some pals and some gin? Or both?! How you want to cope with crap going on in your life is completely your call. Your friends may want to drag you out or invade your home if they know you're struggling and that's cool too. They always know just want you need! It's wise to take on board their view on things too, after all they are some of the people who know you best.

How do you cope when you're feeling overwhelmed? Let me know in the comments and let's have a chat. Hopefully I won't be away for so long next time!

Love always, 
Samantha x
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